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For a child who has experienced developmental trauma, the world may continue to feel unpredictable or unsafe, even when the immediate danger has passed. Responses that rely mainly on rewards and consequences can miss the unmet need beneath a child’s Behaviour. At Embrace Fostering, carers are therefore supported to respond in ways that priorities emotional safety, connection and each child’s individual needs.
Our foster parents are introduced to our therapeutic ethos through Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP). Drawing on attachment theory and an understanding of developmental trauma, DDP helps carers look beyond behaviour, remain emotionally available and build trusting relationships at a pace that feels safe for the child.
In this blog, we explore what DDP is and how it shapes practice at Embrace Fostering. We also introduce the PACE model, consider the impact of developmental trauma and explain how carers are supported to use these principles in everyday family life.
What Is Therapeutic Fostering?
Therapeutic fostering offers an attachment-informed, trauma-responsive approach for children whose early experiences may have affected their capacity to feel safe, regulate emotions and trust adults. Experiences such as neglect, abuse or repeated disruption can shape how a child understands relationships and responds to stress. Alongside a nurturing home, children and carers are held within a network of preparation, reflection and ongoing support:
- Trauma-informed preparation from the outset: Therapeutic thinking begins during assessment and preparation rather than after approval. The Form F home study is trauma-informed, and Embrace’s therapist contributes to session 4 of Skills to Foster. This helps prospective carers begin to understand how early adversity can shape a child’s development and Behaviour, while recognising that becoming a therapeutic carer is an ongoing process of learning, reflection and support.
- A dedicated supervising social worker and reflective therapeutic support: Each fostering family is supported by a supervising social worker who offers guidance, reassurance and space to reflect. Supervision visits take place every 4 to 6 weeks; co-carers are seen at least every 3 months; unannounced visits take place twice yearly; and support is available around professional meetings. Carers also receive therapeutic reflective supervision with Embrace’s therapist every two months, while supervising social workers have monthly therapeutic supervision with the therapist. Together, these spaces help the team remain curious about the child’s experience, think carefully about relationships and support carers to sustain compassionate, regulated responses.
- Access to ‘Embrace Each Other’ support groups: These monthly therapeutic support groups, led by our in-house therapist, offer a reflective and supportive space alongside a community of carers who share the same PACE-informed values. Carers can celebrate progress, think together about difficult moments and strengthen relationships with others who understand the realities of fostering. A 24-hour telephone advice line, available 365 days a year, also means that carers can speak with a professional who knows them and their family whenever support is needed.
This is what it means to be part of a therapeutic community: the child and carer are not expected to manage alone. From the beginning, a consistent network surrounds the fostering family, helping everyone to pause, reflect and respond in ways that promote safety, connection and stability.
Understanding Developmental Trauma & Attachment
Developmental trauma can arise when a child experiences neglect, abuse or repeated instability while their brain, relationships and sense of self are developing. Rather than being limited to one event, these experiences may be ongoing and can shape a child’s expectations of themselves, other people and the world before they have the language to explain what has happened.
One important area that may be affected is attachment: the developing relationship between a child and the adults who care for them. When care is responsive and consistent, a child gradually learns that distress can be shared, help is available and relationships can be trusted. When care has instead been frightening, unavailable or unpredictable, a child may develop protective ways of coping that once helped them survive but can make later relationships feel difficult or unsafe.
This helps us understand why ordinary family experiences can sometimes feel difficult for a child who has experienced developmental trauma. Responses that may be described as defiance, withdrawal or boundary-testing can be protective strategies communicating fear, uncertainty or an unmet need. A child may pull away from closeness or remain alert to danger even when they are currently safe. Therapeutic fostering at Embrace Fostering begins with a shift from asking, “What is wrong with this behaviour?” to wondering, “What might this child be communicating, and what do they need from us?” This is why carers are supported to use Dyadic Developmental Practice to build safety and trust over time.
What Is Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP)?
Dyadic Developmental Practice was developed to support children whose experiences of abuse, neglect or disrupted care have made it difficult to feel safe in close relationships. Rather than seeking only to manage behaviour, DDP attends to the relationship and the meaning beneath the behaviour. Its central principle is that healing is supported through safe, attuned connection rather than correction alone.
At its heart, DDP recognises that children are better able to trust, learn and develop when they experience emotional safety. Carers are supported to remain calm, open and connected during moments of distress, lending the child their regulation until the child can gradually develop more of their own. This asks a great deal of carers, which is why reflection, supervision and compassion for the carer are essential parts of therapeutic practice.
DDP focuses on:
- Attachment theory: How early relationships shape a child’s sense of safety and trust.
- Trauma research: Understanding how developmental trauma affects the brain and behaviour.
- Intersubjectivity: The idea that we come to understand ourselves through being deeply understood by another person.
In practice, this means that carers are supported to:
- Respond to the feeling behind a behaviour, not just the behaviour itself
- Stay emotionally regulated so they can help the child regulate too
- Build trust gradually through consistency rather than quick fixes
- See difficult moments as opportunities for connection, not just discipline to manage
Rather than beginning with “How do we stop this behaviour?”, DDP encourages carers to wonder, “What might this child be communicating, and how can I help them feel safe enough to stay connected?” Boundaries still matter, but they are held with empathy, curiosity and an understanding of the child’s developmental needs. The PACE model offers a practical way for carers to bring this relational stance into everyday life.
The PACE Model
DDP is more than a theory; carers bring its principles into everyday interactions through PACE: Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy. PACE is not a script or a demand to respond perfectly. It is a flexible relational stance that helps carers stay emotionally available and respond to what a child may be experiencing in the moment.
Playful
Playfulness means bringing lightness, warmth and shared enjoyment when it feels safe and appropriate for the child. A gentle tone or moment of humour can reduce shame, ease tension and help connection feel less threatening; it is never about minimising a child’s distress.
Accepting
Acceptance means recognising that a child is more than their behaviour or their history. Carers communicate that the child’s inner experience is understandable and that their worth is not in question, even when behaviour needs a clear and safe boundary.
Curious
Curiosity replaces judgement with a gentle wish to understand. Instead of assuming intent, carers wonder what a behaviour may be protecting, expressing or asking for. This helps the child feel less blamed and, over time, supports them to make sense of their own thoughts, feelings and experiences.
Empathetic
Empathy communicates, “Your feelings make sense, and you do not have to face them alone.” By noticing and naming the child’s emotional experience without judgement, carers help reduce shame, support co-regulation and nurture trust. Empathy does not remove boundaries; it helps the child experience them within a caring relationship.
Together, these four qualities offer carers a steady way to remain connected with children whose early relationships may have felt unsafe or unpredictable. PACE is less about following a fixed set of rules and more about returning, as often as needed, to a position of warmth, acceptance, curiosity and empathy. Ruptures can happen in any family; therapeutic practice also makes space for repair.
Why Does This Matter For Foster Families?
For children who’ve experienced developmental trauma, consistency and emotional safety aren’t just small details; they’re the foundation that everything else is built on. PACE gives carers a steady way to respond, so a child slowly learns that their home and the people in it can be trusted even on the hardest days.
It can also change how carers understand moments of distress. Instead of seeing withdrawal, rejection or controlling behaviour only as something to correct, carers are supported to recognise possible communication of fear, shame or uncertainty. This understanding can make it easier to pause, regulate and respond with both compassion and appropriate boundaries.
Over time, repeated experiences of safety, repair and dependable care can strengthen the whole fostering family. Trust may grow gradually and unevenly, but each responsive interaction can contribute to greater stability, deeper relationships and new possibilities for healing and development.
Thinking About Therapeutic Fostering?
Therapeutic fostering is not about always having the perfect response. It is about being willing to reflect, learn and repair, while offering a child consistent care and connection. With Embrace’s training, therapeutic ethos and wraparound support centred on both the child and the carer, fostering families have people alongside them to think through difficult moments and recognise progress.
If you’re considering fostering or want to understand more about what makes Embrace’s approach different, we’d love to hear from you. Get in touch with our team today to find out more about becoming a therapeutic foster carer.
